JANUARY

Stubborn and hard-hearted. Ambitious and serious. Loves to teach and be taught. Always looking at people’s flaws and weaknesses. Likes to criticize. Hardworking and productive. Smart, neat and organized. Sensitive and has deep thoughts. Knows how to make others happy. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Rather reserved. Highly attentive. Resistant to illnesses but prone to colds. Romantic but has difficulties expressing love. Loves children. Loyal. Has great social abilities yet easily jealous. Very stubborn and money cautious.

Found these when i stumbled Dessy's blog.. =.="

Never gana poke, u will never know the pain. So what u dun have friends anymore? So what i got so many friends? If 2yrs ago i did not lost my hp, u think my contacts got so little only 400+? It's a fact lor. Got so many for wat? Useless wat.. Juz like that kind of friend u had there. Got one like that already headache liao then u still wan many many? Juz live life lah. I can be shui bian too and can have tons of friends but got use meh? Maybe next time got use for them lah but who knows?

When i told him my past, he was shocked. Earning so little while i earn so much but never he imagine i'm so poor last time. Candles, darkness, coldness, houseless, dirtyness. None of the situations he had ever experienced. Then cham what cham? Very jialat meh? When i 1st started work i drink tap water and eat white bread, u can meh? When i 1st started work i smoked paper, u dare to smoke that in public? When i 1st started work, eating one meal a day with one big bottle plain water tahan a wk, maybe this one u can. Every mth end facing vitamin M and every home also get vit M from u, u can tahan? Somemore that time only getting like 1k flat back home nia. Also can survive ah. So wat i earn more now? So wat i dun need to pay anything at mth end? So wat i dun have liabilities? It's how u look at life mah. The more farkup u think u are in, then the more farkup ur situation is lor.. Nowadays kids are too good life. Never slept the streets before. Never slept the bridges before. Never slept near the sea before. Never really gets the bitterness that i had once went thru. CB when i was in that state when i was 6yrs old, u are still drinking milk lor. Never had anyone been more jialat state that i ever been thru..

So conclusion, ditch that friend of urs. He's not even fit to a called a 'friend', more like a fiend to me. 1st time steal ur gf. 2nd time steal ur hp. What's next? If juz now that one is me, i'm afraid his head already kissed my glass bottle liao.

Been emo lately also. Dun really wanna tok abt it.. Whenever tok to her in msn, made me tear down my mask.. Forever putting up a strong front whenever msn chat her but forever tear down thereafter.. It's not that i dun wanna try.. Juz maybe i'm really tired.. Even got the heart also dun have the strength.. Dun bother introducing gals to me, really.. I'm really a bad guy, not worth hurting ur friends.. I know u knew i wouldn't.. But i juz dun wan.. I really dun care.. I know how much u wanted to pull me outta the pit.. But please, dun get pull down by me.. I may be once ur buoy but i juz dun wan to see u as a buoy now.. How come i sound so much like 'her' and how come i realised my plannings are juz like 'her'..? =.=" Anyway, nvm.. Juz let me hide and put up my mask a little longer.. Maybe after this yr the end is really near.. Somemore i still got two more pending holidays cfm liao.. Thailand and Taiwan.. Both i'm so looking forward to them..

Mon when i'm returning from sls after getting my comp fixed and when i'm inside the taxi passing by Riverfront, how i wish i'm outta town and no need to think so much abt anything.. Be it work, rs, money or friends.. It's really deep and stubbornly i juz dun wanna climb up.. Juz let me be for the time being.. The more u forced me, the longer i shall be in and the more i fight back and hide..

Now i understand.. So many gals yet so empty.. Soul-less soul back again.. Maybe it's juz gonna be me, myself and i.. Anyway, the plan to get married in two yrs time is still on.. Well, i'm not supposed to say this but i juz can't hide when i'm facing this blog.. Maybe i shld del this and made one that's only in my own comp where no one sees unless i died.. Sad..

Anyway, thanks dawn for ur time in msn juz now.. U are still the best.. Dunno why dunno how, i always manage to reveal myself a little to u and u always manage to catch it and tear it all down.. Despite my fightback and u continue to grumble non-stop trying to hit those words into my brain and try to pull me out of that hole.. Haiz.. It's my bad.. Anyway, really appreciate it.. *hugz*

Pixon sold at $380 to fellow lenovo colleague. At 1st he bid $280 only and singtel wanna eat at $300.. Actually looking at $400 lor.. Only 1 mth old but aiya for him only, deal. Left with the itouch nia.. Dunno to release or not to release.. Really no use for that liao... Usage lesser and lesser.. =.=" Highest fetched so far only $400 while i'm looking at $450.. One week only drop 100, pain lor... Nv drop before, haven't reg warranty also.. Charged less than 3times... Sigh..

Well, jason got it rite. I'm not in need of money at all.. Juz that i seriously no need all those liao.. Why waste and let the value drop? Juz like my bike now, swee swee liao and i can fetch much higher price than before but i still not selling yet.. Tats becoz i got a need for it mah.. Somemore it's cheaper than getting a 2A bike and my installment finishing liao in abt half a yr or so.. By then i only need to pay 2T oil and petrol and parking money only.. I dun get summons de... Oops! =X Only tio illegal parking then gana.. Lolx me safety rider leh...

Sell itouch and pixon can cover my cover for Iphone 3G liao. Why not? Anyway, bring so many things for wat? My bean bag getting more and more full lor.. =.=" Heavy leh.. ZzZzZzZz.. Anyway, my mio coming on the 31st and iphone on 25th. Slowpoke sia they all.. =.=" Then after that will go cut off my starhub internet. Wee...

Tml's her off day so i off also. ^^ But yest chatted on the phone and she said maybe unable to meet liao.. Lolx.. Though looking forward to it but always be prepared for the worst. =) Anyway, if really meeting i guess later early in the morning she will call me bah.. Then we shall for go breakfast together. ^^ Long time no tongbang a gal liao.. Lolx.. Anyway, even if not meeting also nv mind.. Coz will be heading over to sim lim to get my comp fixed. Then maybe find ppl out la liang lor.. If not will go vivo disturb.. lolx.. Need to bathe my bike tml.. >.<

Ok going to prepare liao coz going boatquay for a while.. Meeting dell. He say he emo, need a drink.. =.=" Lucky i finish report liao.. This wk very little so easy to do but bad news lah.. Lolx.. Coz meaning lesser comm. Sigh..

Sold my Compaq Presario since i'm not using it at all when sis return it to me as she's got her mac liao.. Sold my fat psp since i'm like not been touching it for eons.. Sold my dopod phone since i'm so lazy to even bring it out.. Maybe selling off my pixon and itouch also.. Wah lao me so waste of money.. Now using Nokia 6121 now my sis fone as she using LG viewty..

Computer broke down, think mainboard spoilt.. Less than one mth.. =.=" Think if can will change another board.. get a more highend one.. =.=" Lucky still got my hp mini note..

Me and her getting along better lately.. Dunno how, the chemistry seems to be back.. So that is to say we will experience cold wars once a mth? lol... Last time even her time of mth also no like that de.. Anyway, really got change liao.. At least for now still secure. =) Xiaoqiang said she's pretty when he saw her pic. Lolx.. To him every gals also pretty lah.. But when he saw one of the pic that i took with jessie at nana, he was shocked to see how possible am i with such a chiobu! lolx.. Well yea, she look really stunning that day. Tat's the day of the raining day when i accompany her till her 'driver' came to pick her up..

Suddenly gotten a 'i miss u' from her. =.=" Really made me unable to work properly that day after lor.. Lolx she really is like dawn lor.. Will always make me wanna dote on her.. Well, which gals dun like to be pampered.. Haha.. But someone said she expensive leh.. Lolx...

"You wan to sian this ah lian ah..?"
"Sian her? I as well go for jessie.."
"Huh?! That one high maintenance lor....."

Guess who am i toking to? Lolx... Absolutely not jason though. =P

Shag out from pc show. As expected to be over.. Non-stop daily upgrading of rams and opening invoices and changing of systems.. Chaotic lor.. Sell until no stock also dunno.. Then today got fark by supervisor for doing something wrong.. =.=" Din know it made a different.. But if were to give what show is offering, ain't that gonna another minus sign to that sale? Cheaper by $100 and no warranty and so many free gifts.. If overall sales got gp then of coz direct refer liao lor.. Sigh.. Anyway, it's over and of coz same mistake cannot happened twice..

Knn that fatty no reply. Such an obvious hint lor knn. Can i hold back his pay as revenge? I believe i'm capable of doing that. Pay nia mah, dun take lor. Anyway give him pay also left with nothing, hold him back half a mth force him to tahan longer. Two more days grant.

So many pics in my fone but so lazy to upload.. lolx.. Think few more days will do it bah.. Today work until i wan to slp liao.. Desktops only left display sets and laptops also not much.. Still not to sure wat can sell wat cannot sell.. Sian. I hate this kind of life. Half-hearted selling. Later i sell then no stock tio fark again. =.=" Getting tired of these kind of life liao..

Since when did i become a touchsmart king. Wtf lor i only sold a few sets nia.. =.=" 1st time working with HP colleagues.. Feeling not bad but dun have the cooperation, the teamwork not strong enuff lor.. Unable to feel the heat to get me on fire to sell non-stop.. Only manage to get a little of adrenline in my vein.. Not shiok enuff..

Gotten myself a itouch and help my sis to IPP a macbook. >.< Really regret in getting that ipod.. Shld have gotten iphone instead.. Upon using the net access and using the screen and feeling the speed of itouch, straightaway feel like throwing away my pixon.. =.=" The scrolling is total junk as compared to itouch.. Imagine using iphone.. The only thing i dun like is the keyboard.. My fingers are still a bit too big for it.. Anyway, it rox.

Been trying to get my compaq and hp to run leopard on them.. Unable to get them to work yet.. Short of patching or something i guess.. Sigh.. Excited in getting them to turn into mac..

Bike finally back but the block seems to be faulty liao.. Think need to go service the block.. Dangerous if dun do it.. Tml morning meeting yx for breakfast then go do liao.. Richard and Adam said my bike is finally something presentable as compared to the old yellow.. Much better than before liao.. More beautiful of coz.. But still, urge me to hurry to change to S4.. =.=" Wasting my 2A like that. Lolx.. I also wish.. But i dun wan too much of a liability mah.. Even my starhub i also wan to cut liao.. Getting singnet coz it's cheaper.. Everything need to cut cost le..

We are granted final 2 yrs.. Really forcing us to move out liao.. Sigh.. 2yrs neither short nor long.. Planning ahead liao, did told yx abt my plannings. Settling down and getting my own house in 2yrs time cfm.. Be it whoever it may be lah. The plan muz be abide.. Some decisions are different or rather it's crucial when age gets on.. Time doesn't turn back for anyone.. Everything is racing against time.. I dun wanna start buying a flat when i'm 40 then only can take 15yrs loan which gonna be freaking xiong.. At least having a choice, why not? The future can be achieved, juz a matter of planning and time and effort.. Afterall, it still takes two hands to clap.. Can anyone teach me how to clap with one? I dun mean slap.

Surprisingly that Cyndi said she drive.. Lolx.. This xiao ah lian not jian dan wor.. She's "cunning" from wat i feel.. She's not easy lor.. Even with 'hit-and-run' tactic might not work on her.. Though that's not my actual planning lah.. Juz being random. But anyway, she's good in doing sales. =.=" Got closed once liao. ZzZzZzZzZz..

Jessie sent me the taiwan webby lol.. I really wan to go.. >.< Probably booking for Oct trip shld be good.. Weather is good from Nov though according to jason. =.=" Remind me of genting.. Purr like a kitty but shiok! Haha.. At least dun go during winter ok liao.. Liang liang one can go la liang.. Lolx..

Tired.. Forever like not enuff slp.. I wonder how my lovely can tahan that job. Still praying for her to quit that job or got sacked.. =X Yes i'm bad but it's for her own good lor. =.=" There so complicated and somemore it's bad for health to work nightlife and i dun like it at all.. If going to chiong nightlife comparing to working nightlife is entirely different lor.. Juz like how i dun wan dawn to go work pub that time, not even for once.. Nightlife is to be enjoyed not worked thru-out.. Even though i were to open a shop there, i wun be so stupid to stay there all the way until shop closes for the day lor. Work smart not work hard. I may not be a good follower, but that doesn't mean i'm not a good leader. =.=" If at the show there each full-timer were to have 2 part-timer and work as a team, i dun believe my team will lose to anyone. I may not be as good as some, but i will not lose to those majorities..

One person can close one deal, ten can close ten. Multipliers dominate. Knn how come i sound like MLM. =.=" Well, actually that's one of the fastest selling ability that one can imagine.. Afterall i'm in that darkness of despair before where everything almost gone, friends & relatives. Imagine everyone treating u like a ghost.. Still got one can come and call me ghost when he himself is in no comparison as compared to me as of now. =.=" Laughing while he himself is the laughing stock but too bad he himself also dunno he is a clown. Sad. Still look like a wuss to me since dunno when. Pussy.

When i had stopped all my urges, she called and sounded so gentle like she used to be.. Like asking me how come so many days din call her, instead of questioning me why i din call. Already took wed as my off day which WAS her usual off day, but today she told me she off on monday. Reached home 6am then used com all the way till 8pm then too late and tired to go out.. Still mentioned intend to go out to buy my watch, my supposed to be x'mas present or was that a bday present? Either one, that was way too late. Wanted to told her to forget it, no need to waste money or rather no need to waste effort, juz fuck it. Since i already bought a watch that i liked. Anyway, not interested. There were so many things she din know coz she never like to listen, juz tok and tok and tok, kept cutting off wat i wanna say. Though i loved being a listener, but i juz being forever a listener.. It's all abt give and take..

Juz like how she do not know how tough life is working in a war.
Juz like how she do not know i bought myself a new HP.
Juz like how she do not know i bought myself a new watch.
Juz like how she do not know how much i'm suffering from silent lonesome despite attached.
Juz like how she do not know i've not been flirting around despite being given so much freedom and yet being so alone.
Juz like how she do not know how i hated gals working nite life to be my partner.
Juz like how she do not know how i've been cracking my brain when we gonna be forced out of our house despite those troublesome hassle that had to be dealed with..

Juz two words, life sux.. Well, come to think of it. I'm still starting the cold war.. I'm not gonna call her at all. Waste time and money only. I as well use that time and effort to close more deals. I'm more in need of money than love..

Been a bit into mac lately.. Trying to turn my comp into a mac.. Tired sia by doing research.. =.=" Then somemore the file downloaded cannot be used.. zZzZzZzZz.. Little sis also said she wanna get a mac coz my compaq notebook seems to breaking down soon..

Shag.. Think going to slp soon.. Tml off, think will upgrade my desktop to vista ultimate..

Friday, as promised for Cyndi. Went to QB with brandon and jason.. Supposed to open a Martell for her but in the end did not.. Coz Brenda took out Richard's balance and my balance. Total add up almost 3/4 liao.. Tried pia and drank till drop, but unable to finish them all.. =.=" Stayed till 4am+..

Sat went down again but this time alone.. Lolx.. Carol came thereafter her work after 12am. Then jason came after his session with seb they all but jason went off early coz he said he tired.. Carol also went off soon after.. I stayed all the way till my songs came.. 4.30am.. =.="

Sun went down to coffeeshop with acer, gateway and dell for a short drink.. Tok cock alot with me almost dozing off. =.=" Damn shag.. Steven still say wanna go boat quay for 2nd round.. Lolx.. Anyway, also stay all the way till abt 4am..

SHAG!!!!

Roadshow doing full shift all the way since tue till sun.. Then still got drinking sessions.. Haiz.. Think health is getting worse.. Dunno on wed or thurs, had a row with her.. Actually not really a row lah.. My recept is poor with my bluetooth on then she kept unable to hear clearly then throw her tantrums on me. Knn i disable liao and call her back then she said she dun wan to tok liao. Thus till now i never called her at all. For wat? I rather call Cyndi and disturb her..

Xiaoling is so amused by cyndi's tongue stud but disgusted by the sound she made as she kept using the stud to rub her teeth.. Lolx.. It's nothing new to me anyway.. Her tattoo on her lowerback is so similar to my ex.. Yeah those wings.. Jason still disturb me saying i miss the 'tattoo-feeling'.. Well, in a way yes. Anyway, been sleeping alone for so many mths liao, used to it le.. Since last yr i think. Anyway, not impt lah. Sales been pretty bad.. Even with the roadshow.. Only managed to close 44 sets for the roadshow.. I'm really a roadshow-flop.. Though everyday reached early and did best to close the 1st set but on sat i did roti-prata during the roadshow though on top got abt 10sets.. Roti-prata means zero. =.=" Then sun own-goal so many, 3 sony, 2 acer, 2 lenovo and 1 gateway got stolen but din get back coz he served long time liao while i got bitten by a snake.. ZzZzZzZz..

Unable to see the future.. Seems like it's getting harder and harder to work liao.. Haiz.. Have to endure.. The good ole times will come again.. Heard pay will be delayed. Diao.. Ever since i started working this is the 2nd time liao.. =.=" Heard that Terry cannot tahan liao.. But his sales there is as good as mine.. But maybe the people there not as good as mine.. Over here i've got splendid colleagues and friends, even customers.. Afterall, good services rendered aren't for nothing.. Juz like that day at vivo look-see for the roadshow and my customer recognised me, the one who bought the DV3605TX from me. Nice lady. Customer database might be quite an impt factor of the community for the future to come..

Bike haven't got back yet still under repairs.. But when get back liao also cannot do hair le.. Lolx.. Aiya doing sales, appearance also a factor lor.. Juz like how i see a flop-but-chio-gal can close a deal even if the cust dun wanna buy de.. I meant perfume here.. lolx.. Anyway, i still got a long way to learn.. Knowledge of products is not the main but the technique of closing.. Juz like how two of my colleagues who know so little abt computers and yet they can close deals like nobody's business and get so high pay.. One of them is aiming skill, the other is hardwork.. But actually both had both.. Imagine they are like me dilly-dally kept nua-ing and expect my sales can be better than all brands.. =.=" When i see how steven closes all his deals on sun really got me nothing to say.. 23 sets per day is not yet the best for him.. Even gateway can close several sets despite the branding not strong.. Whereas my brand is quite strong but i flop and also only closed a few deals.. I think i need to wake up.. If not my gross gonna drop below 2k liao if i go on like that........

Juz back from Whiskey Bar and QB Bar... Ya again drank until so late.. i juz feel like drinking lor... At 1st only at coffeeshop coz got colleagues quarrel.. Suddenly juz swap over to BQ and reached there QB almost full house so we went whiskey.. Played pool kept getting wall-snook.. =.= Anyway, when we almost done before going over to QB for 1 last jug, i went toilet.. On the way there past the pool table, suddenly got stopped.. Got a cute gal ask the player to drink but since i'm beside him, i also gana.. =.=" Then she said she only worked on fri, sat and sun so she gave me her number and told to go drink on friday.. Diao.. So easily i was hooked. lolx.. Well, afterall i'm such an anything guy mah.. ZzZzZzZzZz.. She kept emphasising me to come on friday.. =.=" Quite ok lah.. made in singapore de.. Quite cute.. Figure not bad also..

My bad again.. Though i'm still home alone.. Anyway, i'm juz a so anything guy.. Anyone who managed to get a little close to me, sure got chance de.. I juz dunno how to reject.. Lolx.. Somemore i'm in no status now.. Haha.. Aiya still nothing happened.. Toking abt it, botak seems to have a chance with one of gal who trying to fake drunk.. WTF lor.. Whoever also knew she faking it.. Anyway, he managed to steal a kiss.. Lolx.. Unlike me, always accomplished nothing.. Was it really that i dare not or i juz dun wan to..? Juz like how daring i am to straight telling xiaoling how beautiful she is directly on her face.. Somemore, a few times not juz once.. Ok i admit i'm over liao.. A bit drunk leh though only high..

Jialat lah report haven't do and yet this whole wk doing full shift from 11am till 10pm.. I requested it though by right rotating shift... I juz dun wan too much time on hand.. To make myself think so much despite suppressing it.. I thot i might broke down anytime but seems to be staying strong like i always do.. I juz dun anyhow play around when it comes to such.. Even though it's only a little, but there's still commitment and effort in it...

So, my planning was accurate afterall.. Planning to get a house with my mum's name instead of with wife's name.. No matter what, i want my own house with no liabilities.. House more impt than car.. At least this is an asset, car is not.. Though bike is dangerous but i believe i will be ten times more careful when i got back my bike.. Well, that's me, myself and i.. Crap.. I'm still me.. Emo-ing kept coming back upon removal of mask when there's no one knowing me around me.. Sibei tired.. Sibei sian.. Sibei shag..

Juz back from QB.. Nothing much there.. Xiaoling not working, brenda not working, xiaocui not working, stacey not working.. But ok lah, i juz wanna try to make myself a bit drunk.. Coz this time really almost the end of story liao.. Closing the book with the final chapter, the cold war.. If a year's relation were to end that easily, then that will be nothing.. I kept telling myself i dun put in much effort, i kept showing ppl i not interested and doesn't really care much but still inside i do feel the pain.. Pain is inevitable.. No pain is bluff.. Afterall, one year is not too short nor too long but every single of them i really give it all or at least 80%.. Not easy not to give anything.. Coz i'm still a human..

Even though things gonna really end, fault lies on me this time. I will bear no grudges nor hatred.. Juz let it go.. Maybe i still prefer singular lifestyle than to restrictions.. But came to think of it, it's becoz there's not much restrictions that's y things still do happened.. To be frank, i rather got tied down by someone.. Or at least she will go down together and of coz i will behave.. lolx.. Anyway, why do such things happened? Juz like how come her husband will still go down to geylang despite they are married for two years? Anyway, no outcome forseen. I still got a future while she still got her husband. What's not meant to be, no point going on to be to make things work..

Well, i'm not looking in one yet in the meantime so that i can fool around while i still can.. Lolx.. Quite uneasy to do that when being attached.. Afterall, there's a commitment there.. A responsiblity.. For like 9 mths i've been so guai.. It's so unlike me when i'm single.. Life only lives once, so be it..

Knn why i so emo today.. Conclusion has not been resolved and reviewed yet.. No conclusion yet during amber timing.. A week at most bah..

Went for short holiday with jason and gang. Nothing much.. Din really enjoy or rather felt quite a waste of money and time.. Spent abt 300 total, actually i rather use it for taiwan trip or even thailand.. Sigh.. Bought a 3-quarter pants quite nice and a 'levis-material-jacket'. Also several 'cosmetics' lolx.. Oh ya and some undergarments.. Dawn still curious to see what kind of garments i buy when i met up with her on the day i back at vivo.. =.=" Still as attractive as usual that aroused so many eyes on her.. lolx.. Together went over to catch zhiwei with his daughter and wife.. Lolx.. Dawn told me he denied his child on msn with her.. Anyway, met up liao then everything blow liao lor.. Aiya married liao still wan to play meh.. Some wife quite nice also mah.. ZzZzZzZzZz.. Dunno wat he thinking..

Wah computer totally diff from last time liao.. Speed much more faster.. When reached home on computer then get changed, i haven't even changed finish it reaches windows liao.. =.=" Last time still can go pee back and it's almost done.. =.=" Anyway, quite satisfied with it, in fact i'm happy with it..