Sales going normal lately. Back to norm I guess.. Though that's really not enuff for me to hit my target, think shld be ok lah.. At least still can survive lah.. Juz like how I survive with nec pay.. Anyway, commitments aren't as great as before.. Juz normal house issues and that forever drunken guy issues. Really cannot have cash on me. Really knn. That place is utterly cannot be called a place, home. Hell with it.

Slept really early lately and wakey early for roadshows.. It's a bit extreme and unlike me.. Lolx.. But sometimes, that's our part to fulfill lah.. Juz like even though i'm not being paid on mon to thur, but still come work.

Bike was being sent to shop to do repairs and maintenances.. Repair valve, clean exhaust, change brakes, change engine oil, change spark plug, change a dunno wat thing that caused my bike to cannot start.. Oh, and put silencer. Anyway, doing these minors cost me over 300 bucks. =.= Shag. Maybe when take back liao and i'm more comfortable with it, I might juz keep it till the end of time or maybe till class 2 or class 3..

That had quite a long chat with my gf on the fone than usual.. Happened that somehow, several events were alien to me when she said she did told me before. My memory wasn't that bad lor. Haiz.. Can feel the bridge again.. Was it me or was it the dark cloud again? Commit myself? No way. At least not yet.

Been taking train lately.. Really not used to public transport.. Missed my train two times.. One time at Jurong Interchange and have to take cab back, that day had a few cans of beer with Richard and Steven after roadshow.. Second at Dhoby Ghaut and have to walk home, help cust to do installation and setup after work after her school.. Though Dhoby Ghaut near to home but kinda lazy from a tiring day of work yet dun wanna waste money on cab.. Money not easy to earn even though earning more than before.. Need to learn more from uncle tianxing.. Hahaha..

Wah wah wah. Adam and ken help me sell DV6773TX today and also a 2800 series from ken.. Uncle and keith help me sell DV4 series! Mr richard also help me sell DV5. Wow wow. Actually no matter what they sell, all of them are very nice ppl. Lol tripod.. But no leh, all of them really nice guys mah. Super duper good de. Haha. Anyway, what they sold are not impt lah, coz down the bottomline, I still have to do my job. It's not as if I can get lazy and slp at home. Though got ppl said that i'm a Three-Point-Five.. Ya three-point-five-floppy-disc. In short, flop. =.= Then I closed one power-pack and he took back his words. Not I dun wan to close deal leh.. Juz dun have the chance leh. Sigh..

Kept thinking of the negatives. Paliah leh.. For a such MIC, she shld be finding an old one with cpf credited into bank account de.. But why me? A broke with no future.. =.= And somemore that time when no working it wass her who supported me a bit financially.. Even when going drinking there's few times she's the one paying for it.. Joanne, brandon and jason do know abt this coz they saw.. Now what I did was merely a 30 bucks fone card monthly. Wtf. And repay with negative thoughts with that aroused suspicions on blank. For her there's no necessity to play such coz there's not much benefits from me and no liabilities.. Well I understand that she can 'do it' now and she might 'do it' the next time, but the reason for this case is, i'm not impotent.. It's neither the dark cloud nor her. It's juz me, myself and I. When will I stop playing..?

Juz came back from Tiong Bahru. Today supposed to meet up Jason for sentosa.. Put him plane and early morning went bukit panjang meet up Alicia and her younger cousin for breakfast. After that me and her cousin took a cab to great world city for her interview as CSA. Told her that it’s wiser to take up at IMM coz it’s nearer to her place but she chose Vivo instead.. Kinda worry coz I’m not there to look after her whereas Alicia told me to.. In fact she wanted me to get her into Courts instead since it’s nearer to her place and got me there to look after her.. Well, in fact her future is brighter at Best.. Work upwards lor.. At least got prospects from wat I see. Not that my side no prospects lah juz that I dunno what she wanted herself or rather what she wanted for the future.. Hope letting her into vivo is not a wrong move haha..

Hmmm… Her mum is the stall holder..? That means Alicia is working for her mum.. Anyway, thurs will be going down to vivo with her for her 1st day of work.. Haha machiam big brother bringing little sister to report work lolx…

Sunday drinking session on form sia.. Crazy.. But gotten super hangover the next day.. =.= Super woozy feeling at work.. Can’t rmb much on that nite.. Only a ‘moshi’ & ‘hello kitty’. Lolx.. And also a five-ten for a kiss. Hahaha.. Actually I dun have a thing for her at all. The xiao bu dian fares better. Lolx..

Maybe tonite got another drinking session.. Anyway, tml going to pick up my baby.. Guess need to wash her liao.. Sure very dirty de.. hmmm..

2 days back went nana with them again. This time so many ppl there.. Zhiwei, nicky, soon heng. Not the usual gang.. Lolx.. Unable to find a reason not to go coz was being pressed by my sweetie as I put her plane once. Haha.. Anyway relax only since i'm not the target.. Zhiwei gana down a lot of glasses.

He said she looks like dawn, not only the looks but the actions and reactions too.. I long time ago did mentioned they are resemblance but no comments from my gf that time.. Anyway, there's no way my sweetie can replace dawn and there's no way my dawn can replace my sweetie. =) Coz to each is individual, there's no replacement nor substitute..

Maybe there's a little confusion here.. Neither dawn nor sweetie are my gf.. Juz my friends. Haha.. A title is juz a title, there's nothing more to it. Anyway, i'm attached though available but made myself unavailable. Lolx contradictions plus complications.

Where are u when I need u most? =.= Off ur stupid fone and dunno wat u are doing. Heck.

Saw the upcoming events.. Sunday drink, monday drink, tuesday drink. Felt weak on the thought of that. Lolx..

From 'complicated' to 'attached'. Hmmm.. Then was it that I heard wrongly abt 'single' two days back? Coz it's that 'single' that's why that married man wanna go nana, or was it becoz she looks like dawn that's why he wanted to go? Anyway, I dunno wat's up but I will not be gone until sweetie is on her way home. She also drank a lot that day.. Thot soon heng sending her home when her guy not coming to pick her up. In the end, I did not send her back even though I planned to. =.=

ICQ

Suddenly received a mail from ICQ in my hotmail.. Did managed to login lolx after so many many years... Found this inside my own profile..


About Me
Setsunasa
Bagurakasu no niwa nareteru no ni
Konna toki dake namida ga
Tomerarenai nowa naze darou...

I dun even rmb wat that means.. I think this got something to do with celly... lolx.. Coz that time it's becoz of cel, i'm more into japanese..

Memories.. Yeah, they still linger.. But better not haunt.. Lolx.. Anyway, juz back from a quickie from boat quay. Coz my supervisor help me sold two DV5, so ok lor. Juz go down awhile.. Access Room reopening?!?! Actually, it's no longer the Access Room.. Took over by another boss dunno from Whiskey or Martin.

Dawn is at Dbl-O, asked me to go over.. Got a little bit tempted by her.. Actually not her but someone else.. Haha.. Tml got roadshow lah.. If not, can consider going de.. Anyway at Millions there quite boring and dun really like it there today.. Ok lah need to go koon liao.. Need wakey early tml.. ZzZzZzZzZzZzZz...

Locked..

Didn't know that she's so active in facebook.. Seeing her now makes me content, at least she can live without me. Live as if i do not exist in her world anymore.. Dunno if she's still in singapore but can see from her facebook she seems to be in New York now..

Days back i tumbled onto her facebook.. Going thru the contents and pics.. There still seems a slight pain in there.. Memories can be painful at times though blissful at the same time.. How ironic.. An untied knot. There's no way to turn back time, neither a way to undo that knot.. Forever etched and locked in that frozen cave that i once broke free with the help of celena.. Ever sentimental as it can be, as painful the agony i can feel inside her that time.. Regrets, are all that i had left with, in the book of life.. I only can wish for all the happiness that she can get.

Getting lazy lately. Rest is to allow more energy for the coming meteor. I simply hate roadshows.

Think no need to go book class 3 liao this week. Roadshow starting in 2 days.. When roadshow ends, can already book my class 2a. Guess will juz have to book both together.

Lolx..

Haha really cannot tahan sia!! Marilyn looks real cute in that new pic with her frowning with her bear!! Lolx.. One word, SWEET! Haha.. Wat's got into me sia lolx.. Maybe i'm too stressed from the aftermath.. Any single little cutie can perk me up lolx.. I'm so fan jian. lolx.. I must be crazy.. Roflmao...

A pity yest didn't go work.. If not i think i can pick up more sales coz overall sales not bad.. Sigh.. Bo bian lah no mood to work also.. Today also ok lor.. At least can vie with Acer but of coz still lose. Haha.. Well i dun mind though. Hee. Coz it's not lenovo or dell that is dominating.

Anyway, thinking of the next upcoming roadshow. Maybe i shld use my c794 to kill the market in terms of pricing.. I mean, need all highs and lows model in order to balance out the nature.. If not ppl like dell or lenovo will kill and eat more shares.. Even though low end more prob also bo bian one..

Beer Fest

Omg i really hate beer. Goddamn shit that i'm almost a goner within 3 glasses straight. Yet they see me can drink with gals then disturb me say i can't drink with them.. Zzzzzzz... I'm drinking Martell leh not beer that time. Beer is really not my cup of tea, erm drink.

Again left my bike at boat quay while richard and the golden hair send me home. I'm drunk but i still manage to walk myself home from the coffeeshop. In the end unable to wakey the next morning.. Rush report for an hr when i woke up at 4pm.. Mina called and asked for my report.. By 5pm, finally done and email it over to them..

Got quite a few calls during my slumber but can't really rmb it well lolx.. Supposed to go work today and pack up those mess of roadshow aftermath.. Got an sms from Olivia that pay will be late and expect delay from now onwards.. No mood to go work. Anyway, i'm not paid on weekdays.. Heck. 1 and a half mth to process pay. Wtf. And yet i'm earning lesser than Lenovo and Dell. Wtf wtf wtf.

Mei chin wanna disturb me to make me drink. Well, can do anything to make me drink but wanna play 'friendship' that's ridiculous. If i dun even treat u as a friend i dun even bother a single shit. Anyway, though i'm drunk but i rmb clearly that i saw Stacey crying outside. But the dog came out real fast. Was that her dog? No idea and not that i really care.

Another roadshow upcoming and pc show upcoming.. Shacks. I'm exhausted even though i got not much sales.. Need a break real soon i guess..

Hmmmm... She seems to be back into the picture. How come feeling slight sour inside..? That shld not be the case leh.. Sigh.. Wat's got into me? Anyway, i shld be happy for her ah.. Wtf dunno wat's my mind made of.

原谅我

原谅我

请不要分了以后还记得亲吻过的承诺

你的永久已不属於我

默默低头那时我很多话梗在喉咙

你的笑你的快乐不是我爱太多想太多

我能感受他比我适合

爱放了手我伪装冷漠比你先说分手

请原谅我原谅我不成熟

不爱你是藉口好让你离开我

请原谅我好想自私将你占有

一个寂寞就给我承受换你过更好的生活

请不要分了以后还记得亲吻过的承诺

你的永久已不属於我

默默低头那时我很多话梗在喉咙

你的笑你的快乐不是我爱太多想太多

我能感受他比我适合

爱放了手我伪装冷漠比你先说分手

请原谅我原谅我不成熟

不爱你是藉口好让你离开我

请原谅我好想自私将你占有

一个寂寞就给我承受换你过更好的生活

爱过恨过哭过也笑过

亲吻过你的脆弱

其实我比谁都要懦弱

原谅我必须假装爱错

别让时间倒流我怕说不出口

原谅我没有解释太多心痛

别无所求彻底忘了我爱原来要舍得我

难过我才懂

=.=

She said today she was very late and someone is sending her to work today.. =.=" I mean, u dun have to feel nervous when u are saying that.. Even though it's a guy who is sending, so what. But, when u saying is a dajie and feeling nervous, that sounds lagi not convincing. Maybe i'm juz too hard to please, maybe another might fits better in the picture..

Everyone had been taking pics like no one business while my dopod cam is spoilt. =.=" In fact, ever since my last, i dun wanna take anymore.. Nvm next week will go get my fone, the screen as well as the cam. No point in getting a new one when mine worth over 1k.. Even if repair cost is more than 10%.. I'm so used to keyboard.. haha.. Anyway, my cam got flash one lor. ZzZzZzZzZz.. Though not like dawn's N95 with 5mp de but still can take de ok!

This time round different liao.. Even though percentage is lesser than the previous, but majority is still on the 'find another' side.. Previous de more vigorious lah.. But i guess a '2-timing' is definitely a no-no coz even myself will not allow it.. Coz i'm always the one got betrayed? lolx.. Normal lah these kind of life. It's all abt suffering and happiness. Nothing is perfect, it's juz balanced..

Kept finding the Ti Amo and cannot find until she posted the mtv.. Lolx.. I'm really very toot toot when finding songs.. But still can get Jay full album lor. Bleahz. =D But this song seems kinda hard to sing.. Coz the chorus part, the guy dun sing much rather than a echo-ing or rather like a backup singer.. Main focus is on the gal side.. And this original singer's voice is so power that she almost covered the guy's voice.. Machiam Dai Ai Ling - Dui de ren. Oh ya she got a new song and heard it several times at Millions and also Whiskey.. Kept on forgetting the name..

Anyway, it's been decided.. Next wk cfm very busy.. Go do my bike, do my specs, book my class 3. Think will be getting 2 days off.. Maybe use one day meet dawn for dinner, maybe with movie..? Hehe.. Of coz with a reason and she knows lah wat's on Xing's mind. =P

Oh shit man!! My sweet nothings never stop! Knn i can even say those sweet nothings to an auntie and made her so happy lolx.. Wtf lor.. Haha. And it still seems to work. Oh shit i think i eat too much honey.. lolx.. My mind had not been rusty so far so long.. But i think i use those on cust better.. Haha..

This mth sales will be quite flop.. But no matter how flop, i cannot flop too much.. Still have to survive lor.. But my roadshow skills still sucky leh. I hate roadshows... Juz like that time sell nec also.. Totally lost and dunno how to sell.. Washing skills total no use.. Haha.. Well they also said, when u cannot even trust ur own ability, who else can? Need to buck up and chiong liao... Even if lapsap also muz grab liao. I'm being too lenient to the staffs for always been wanting to close those with spif for them. I mean, i still have to eat mah. Why care for others when u urself can't even feed urself? But not till the extend of selling all super low-ends lah. Nap one muz still goes nap lah, dun gu-gu go until pk..

Anyway, hope all my CBs come back this weekend.. At least can pick back a bit.. Even though my brand is not a house-brand but still it's quite a strong brand lor. Knn how can lose to other brands.. Since still got some supports, muz chiong also. It's not the time for relax.. This mth sales will be for CNY de lor. When totally no supports, no matter wat brand also die.. Friendship? Friend lan lor. But also have to do the right thing and do things right lah..

Cloud9...

=D =P =)

On cloud nine today.. lolx.. Today's her off day and as expected she's gone to dunno where and do wat but well, not really not i wanna control her that much.. Anyway, i'm having roadshow on my side this week.. In fact, we agreed on going fishing prawn today after dinner and movie.. In the end, felt so bad for not able to accompany her on her off day..

She said she went to meet her aunt for some food at Orchard. Total 5 ppl including kids. Ate Dim Sum and spent over $100+.. She bought a SK-II facial and a blouse for over $400.. =.=" But ok lah.. As long she happy lor.. Anyway, not using my money..

Around 9pm+ she called me and asked me where am i.. Lolx. Was quite shocked that she came down to Causeway Point to find me.. Haha. Went for a smoke when she came then wanted to go eat pizza coz she said she missed pizza.. But they closing soon le so she decided not to eat liao. Anyway, both of us also tired from a day's work.. Sent her to the cab and kiss her goodbye before heading back to my shop to get my invoices then be on my way home..

She again wearing skirt but today no high heels.. I guess it's time i change my transport liao.. Will be going to book my car next wk after my show and end of mth book my class 2a.. Will be taking both together.. Despite yx kept telling me that like that take will be very xiong.. But i still wanna do it leh.. Whenever i decide on something, i dun like to change.. For example, when i decide how to celebrate ur bday, i dun like to change events.. Juz like how i wanted to celebrate for her that day.. Haiz.. Anyway, nvm lah.. Next yr we try again. I wanna make it more memorable for her.. I felt so useless at times..

Spoke to dawn this afternoon on msn.. Luckily there's still someone to talk to during my boring roadshow.. Time is so hard to pass and working hrs so long from 11am till 10pm.. Here not like vivo where so many ppl around know one another and can tok cock all the way till end of day even though got sales coming in..

Mentioned to her abt the gal in her gang, i mean group.. Got not much info leh.. But frankly lah, seen her so many times but never really spoke to her once, however she doesn't fail to catch my attention.. Always smiling and laughing whenever i see her.. Haha. Anyway, they having complains for that Whiskey Bar. Bad service, bad condition, bad attitude. Lolx.. Guess they will be going to Millions next time coz Mei Chin they all at there. But anyway, Millions merging with White Bar i think. Dawn says will intro me that gal the next time they go pubbing will ask me along.. haha. In fact, she wanted to see me and that gal together.. So that all of us can go out often thereafter juz like last time. At least, my 'gf' know them and can click. =.="

This mth sales think going to be gone case again.. lolx.. Going back to old normal sales with maybe enough-money-to-buy-food-salary.. ZzZzZzZzZzZz...

Seriously intend to get car.. Even the cheapest car also can but no super-old-cars please.. Most prob when i get my 2A, i will get my superfour.. Then will go survey and see if paying more down payment can reduce the monthly payments or not.. Anyway, will be cutting down on my internet, cabletv and mobile so as to suffice for the car.. Plans had been made and i dun feel like changing.. Unless i can use my aunt's company name to get a car.. Hehe..

. . . . . . .

The 'I Love You' juz came out like that.. Easily, freely with no extra heartbeat.. Now i understand how it feels when u always ended a call with a 'luv ya'.. Juz so naturally.. So mutual.. And with an instant reply of 'me too'.. She did that without any hesitation. Exactly what i wanted.. Afterall the fire is not out yet.. =)

I'm not into short-term. Everyone sees far in the future but love is blind.. In fact, i'm worn-out long ago so i dun care much abt such.. If got, then got lor.. If dun have, then so be it.. To end it and start anew is total wastage of my time. There's no certain in the future. The next one may not be any better than current, the next one may be better than current. But is there a definite answer? I'm not into play-mode anymore. But if even FT cannot fit into my dictionary then i dunno wat i'm supposed to do. Frankly, i got no trust for MIS. Though i shld not discriminate juz becoz of a few bad sheeps, a rotten apple can caused whole basket of apples to rot even if not all, most of them still rot.. I dun have the patience to find the right apple. So, live and let live.

Weirdo

WEIRD!!! I rmb very very clearly that yest nite i'm still very sober!! I can even rode home!! But juz before i go slp i'm damn drunk!! WTF!!!!

Yest is my courts IT dept supervisor's bday celebration at Millions. Reached there early so went to makan a little at the prata shop then when walk past Whiskey(or was it qb?) Bar and saw Dawn and gang in there. Stare inside from the outside window. Dawn's friend seems so excited on seeing me. =.=" I mean.. I dun even rmb who is she... I dun even rmb her face.. Haha. Went in to disturb a bit before going for my makan. After makan, went back to millions with steven, chua and rebecca. Rebe is our IT dept manager.. 1st time official drink with her. Jasmin also there, the person who is really in-charged of all our stocks for courts IT dept.. Gary from Harvey also there. Desmond from Acer confirm there.. And many that i do not know..

There's this pink lady with black tube sitting next to Jasmin said that i look familiar. I think she's drunk.. Went over to say hi and i try to avoid that table.. Anyway, we got 3 sofa seats.. In the end, i was being dragged to that table to play game, i mean to get drunk.. Whenever losing a dice game and have to drink, Jasmin and her is like so excited machiam siao char bo.. Then that lady called me another name and ask me to drink.. They are drunk liao... Anyway, there's a case of someone's handbag lost and no one knows where she left it.. Even the police came...

There's this white blouse lady, quite big but she's quite old.. She kept revealling her 'valley'.. =.= Then when Desmond is dead drunk lying on the sofa and i was sitting beside him. The lady came over to talk to Desmond and she rest on my leg to talk to Desmond.. =.= I mean, u dun have to use ur that one to rub my pants. Will cannot tahan one lor.. ZZZZZZZZZZ.. Anyway, i dun even rmb her name and i dun even know who she is at the end of the day.. Btw, she's 42 i think. And her kid is 6.. =.= She was there with her bf and she was total goner liao yest..

Anyway, i need to go work liao.. Juz finished my report.. haha.. Wah lao seems like gonna rain again.. I think i really need a car.. Lolx.

Back..

Juz came back from a fast one at nana then go coffeeshop and let them enjoy the western food near my place at S11.. Actually that place i only tried the chicken chop and pork chop both also very nice.. But today they ordered sirlion and cutlet. No idea how is it for them..

Tml richard's bday think gonna go boat quay and pia beer again.. At least that's better than pia 3 martell... =.= Anyway, fingers crossed. Heard from richard today that meijun got 'loot' by weihao before de. A bit sian on that. lolx.. Maybe i shld start getting more open-minded. lolx.. Anyway, now wat century liao.. Unlike before lah..

Heard abt Taiwan trip juz now and i can freely say i can go. Gana disturb also dunno.. lolx.. To be frank, i dun mind going to taiwan, i mean especially taiwan coz it's been a long time since i last yearn to go there.. So even though were to go alone i will still wanna go.. =D

I got discuss with my colleague with overseas trip.. Mentioned that if i were to go overseas, i will not be booking a hotel before going there.. So that no matter where i wanted to go, when it comes to late nite, juz find any place to lodge.. Rather than chiong go back to the hotel.. So troublesome.. Haha...

okok enuff talk of holidays.. Make me wanna run away liao.. Lolx.. When tok abt taiwan i'm so excited.. lolx.. Wei wei.. My mind is clean one hor.. =.=" Juz wanna go there shopping and walk walk and see see nia.. Haha.. Relax only... I really need to relax my body, my mind and my soul..