Well, dun let the history repeat itself.. I dun wanna discriminate neither do I wanna lose both. If I learnt it, I will not get angry nor would I kick a fuss about it. I will be myself, remain quiet and drift away.. =) That's my style.. Everyone escaped from reality.. So, I would not show u the reality.. That's me.. Guys are most afraid of gals naggings, gals are most afraid of guys quietness, chen mo.. So, pls do not be delusional. Like what i said, i dun wanna lose both. Be firm on ur grounds and hold ur horses. Yes, this is a warning.. Coz there's no way i can trust u, u are very similar to her.. Plus, i had zero trust in all of ur gender. Trust had to be earned, not given. Even as a friend.. I had high expections and hopes in you. Dun lose ur worth in me. =) Tell me if it's not gonna happen means it's not gonna happen. U had eaten ur words a few times.. =) U shld be glad i'm still around.. The water-bearer had lotsa tolerants but dun disillusioned.. If u are afraid u would lose me so as to be deceptive, then u would really lose me. Reality wun bites me hard, juz itch. Deception bites me harder, it stabs. =)
I dun understand why did i reveal that i'm a shui bian person.. Well, i dun deny that.. =) Basically i can accept anyone but let's face the facts. Looks do matter. Lolx.. But not to the extreme lah.. Well, at least i must feel comfortable with.. =.= Finding a gf is not for show but rather for companionship. Looks dun last, so i seek the inner which determines overall.. I dun really need contant attention nor compaionship, juz a little bit of appreciation will get me to do more.. haha..
That's what i really like about her.. Though we din even considered started that time and she is not beautiful but i juz enjoy her company.. I felt so comfortable with her presence.. However, i really dun understand how come she's so popular.. Haha.. A form of unknown attraction.. When i heard this song that is playing on my blog, she came to my thoughts immediately.. I can still remember but dun understand how come i can reject a beautiful and good-figured gal even though at that time, i'm single and available and we are not even an item at all.. And she even told me to go ahead when she saw those msg.. Haha.. I like that gracious too.. Oh I kinda miss those days.. Afterall, we are fated not meant to be.. Haha.. Maybe it's better that way..
Anyway, among so many gals, i have yet to find another like u.. A soulmate + companion + motivator + pillar.. Many knew i'm quite confined but when i'm with u i can basically tell u anything automatically, naturally.. I dun even need to hold back anything, u dun even have to ask.. Even though i'm being discriminated and condemned, i'm still hanging on without letting u know.. Coz we are of the same character, we will let go if opposite is suffering.. Sigh... But i've never regretted protecting u, never regretted ease ur itch due to rashes from alcohol, never regretted feeding u fries or letting u feed me in public, never regretted sending u to work at times in surprises, never regretted watching movies with u, never regretted letting u letting go of me.. But u can only be my memories, same goes for me, i can only be ur memories.. In discreet where minimal people knows.. Even with no titles i also dun mind, coz i can feel ur appreciations, gal.. Unspoken appreciations are being felt.. U said u are not worth it, now look at my pathetic state and tell me who really worth it then..? Haha.. Hey gal, u are wrong abt her.. I was right rejecting her that time but i dunno why the hell wouldn't i do it again... Well, maybe it's becoz u are no longer around me at that time as my guardian angel.. Even though u are beside me, u will still ask me to go ahead.. But i always wanted to feel ur intuitions, ur unspoken intuitions inside.. That always gave me an answer, a more clear view of what's going on.. Juz like lending me ur power to gain more insights.. Even though u are not blissful nor happy, u also wun let me know.. But i'm always around.. Hey gal, u know i would.. Dun worry, those in the past are past. History will not repeat itself. I only want u to have the best, not even the slightest down. Again giving unconditionally juz for ur happiness.. As long u are happy, i'm glad.. Like i always do, gal.. Ain't i ur boy no more..? =( If u think it's better that way, i'll let it be.. Take care.. Dun keep doing OT lah.. sigh.. Dunno wat sort of company is that, kept mistreating u.. haiz... Of coz i know abt it.. I'm always in msn, in discreet.. =X Dun get me wrong, i'm not virtually-stalking u!
Where's my angel..? I'm still waiting.. Angels are always in disguised in forms of human.. Let's hope it will not be a devil in disgust.. I mean disguised.. Keyboard got problems.. =X Hope the next one will be my fairytale comes true.. =D =P =)
Oh ya.. Yest that person in my hatelist contacted me on msn. I wonder how the hell he can msg me thru when i long ago already blocked him and i checked, he is still being blocked!!! Then i had to put on my mask and ask the usual and entertain him as a friend.. Feel like puking.. A friend indeed.. Sorry i'm not worthy to be a friend. Goodbye.
